Anyway, somewhere along the many topics of conversation was one of us sharing a boy-hugs-girl moment with the following premises 1) girl likes boy and 2) boy just wants to be friends.

For some reason, my brain’s sign system seems to consist of pop culture references in the short span of . (Pretty f*cked up for a guy who’s working on critical discourse analysis for his thesis. No wonder I’m getting nowhere with it. Reading Gloria Arroyo, interpreting Gremlins. Sheesh!) Here’s how my brain pretty much worked that moment.

1. A movie quote that references hugs: Vince Vaughn’s character in Wedding Crashers circa 2005.

Janice, I apologize to you if I don’t seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don’t like the feeling. You’re sitting there, you’re wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I’m not really interested, should I play like I’m interested but I’m not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she’s not interested? So all of the sudden I’m getting, I’m starting to get interested… And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it’s awkward, it’s like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you’re trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don’t kiss them at all? It’s very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you’re just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called “just the tip”. Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you’re on my hair.

2. A cheesy song used as background music for boy-hugs-girl/boy-kisses-girl moment: Heroes by the Wallflowers. (Struggled to think of the exact movie this was used at that moment. Initially thought it was a 90s teen movie but Rish quashed that thought being the disciple of John Hughes and the “expert” on 90s teen movies. Turns out, it was in that ending to that enjoyably horrible football movie – The Replacements circa 2000 – where Keanu Reeve’s character was snogging Brooke Langton’s character. PS: Who’d have thought that the guy playing that pyschopath SWAT officer/linebacker would later on direct Iron Man?)

And we kissed, as though nothing could fall.

3. A reference to “the friend zone”: Friends by Bog circa 2003. (Sure the show Friends was the one that started the whole idea but Pinoy rock has its gems too. Hits home harder too.)

Ikaw, gusto mo lang ay “friends.” ‘Tang inang “friends.” Ayoko ng kaibigan…

And in my reverie, I missed out on the other details of the story.

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Anyway, this particular letter to the editor published by the Inquirer arguing that the RH Bill will be a waste of precious money. The letter cited three reasons – 1) bill is not designed to educate people, 2) bill won’t feed hungry stomachs, and 3) poor families are on survival mode. Well, incoherent as those points are, I think Ms. San Juan’s point is that the RH Bill will not address poverty and that it will give horny people reasons to have sex out of wedlock.

I guess that pretty much summarizes what needs to be addressed – the very simplistic view regarding what needs to be done. And I do believe that the real reason why the RH Bill won’t fly is the ultraconservative stance.

If If what these conservatives are worried about is that the bill will give people the license to have sex without the consquence of pregnancy, well here’s a question. What’s the big deal? Filipinos have been fucking in and out of wedlock for centuries and for all sorts of reasons. How many couples actually have sex for fun? Survey the youth on the percentage of virgins and I’m sure the statistics will be glaring on how well religion has prevented people from having premarital sex.

I can remember my Religion classes in high school, Catholicism outlines several conditons for intercourse between man and woman which include the sacrament of marriage, and the aims of sharing love for one another and the intent of procreation. Else, the couple is committing a very grave sin. This should’ve been more than enough to prevent our population from booming out of control. And how many couples actually go through this checklist before they do it? Or better, how many Catholics even know these? The thing is that the Catholic Church in the Philippines will never back down and I doubt if they will ever admit any failure in guiding its flock as to what to believe about sex.

The knowledge regarding reproduction, and population growth, and its impact to our society cannot be gained through a vocational degree or whatever degree the university of hard knocks has to offer. Our population problem grew because the system doesn’t provide the basic knowledge that people need to know about sex. (Seriously, I know some college graduate who thought blowjobs can get a girl pregnant.) We need a more structured approach to this problem and the RH bill provides part of the solution.

The bill nor its proponents never claimed that it will be the panacea to poverty. As with many social problems, the problem of poverty needs to be engaged at different fronts. Population control is just one of them. The purpose of education is never to restrict people’s actions but to allow them to be able to critically weigh their options before they act. And that includes the decision to have sex.

Oh, and as if, the huge population isn’t costing us money.

Credits: Thanks to Sir Gerry for linking this in his FB stat and the image credit goes to whoever posted it.

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The problem with people with repressed childhoods (like me) is that we tend to overcompensate when we finally gain some independence and get some spare change from our wee salaries. I guess it runs in the family too. I remember my dad buying me an airsoft pistol only for him to play with it more than I had. (Oh yeah, he’ll be dead for eight years now in a few days.)

Anyway, people have been overly critical of my extreme miserliness. I rarely buy stuff and never spend a cent I wouldn’t earn back immediately or in a bad investment (not that I haven’t made a few, and surely, these drove me to wits’ end). Spending, for me, is a sin. My greatest luxury has always been treating my Dearest to something. I rarely buy clothes, gadgets, other effects and doohickeys for myself.

I have been saving up since late December for this time of the year since my Dearest and I will be celebrating our third year together. Figured it’s about time I don’t get her something dirt cheap this time around. I’ve been snooping and scouting out some possible gift items. After some covert interrogation (sometimes, I just love being a discourse analyst), found out she wants a phone or some hand-held game console or a Nintendo Wii. Good thing my savings were enough to cover any purchase. So I decided to take her to Greenhills just to “look around.”

Honestly, I haven’t been to Greenhills for ages. For a closeted techie like me, showing me so many pieces of plastic and silica can start a massive nosebleed. Death by exsanguination. Call me manipulative but that also had her riled up getting something. I was really considering that we get her a phone but she somewhere she dropped that she’d rather get one through her mobile service provider plan. And she’s always been the Nintendo fan so that would strike out the PSP. She could’ve opted for the Wii but preferred the mobility of a hand-held. She was already ranting about must-give-my-mom-a-proposal-to-get-me-a-phone-and-a-DS-lite when I surprised her with, “O pili ka ng kulay na gusto mo.” Cheeseballs. Hehehe. So we got her a DS Lite.

It was also a good thing when we bumped into our resident Sugoi couple who helped us with the purchase process. I’m such a noob with gadgets. Computers and Web technologies, I can handle, but game consoles. Bah! I’m a philistine when it comes to such things. So we got a package deal that included the console, some protective gear, spare stuff, EDGE, and a 2 GB SD card.

Heck, I have to admit that it was hell-a cheap for me to get her something half the allocated budget (I was prepared to spend for a smartphone or a Wii) but that left me with cash to spare. After much goading from Kyam (and Mastah), I decided to get one for myself too. And oh, Kyam got herself one too.

Just to pass the afternoon (Kyam and Mastah were going to see a movie but the screen time was still 3 hours away), we fired up our Lites (Kyam had an extra DS for Mastah to use) at Figaro and had a Bomberman tourney. Call me childish, but that multiplayer thing is way cooler than any other multiplayer thing I’ve done (Quake, Starcraft, Counterstrike, Call of Duty…). I hope we didn’t piss off a lot of people since that had us blurting “You killed me!”, “Oh shit!”, and “I killed myself!” out loud. That got us planning for a Sugoi DS party one of these days.

It has been years since I mashed buttons. I’ve been a gamer but the PC has always been my “console” of choice. Somehow, having one again, even just a hand-held, had me all giddy as a schoolboy. I spent last night charging the DS Lite. I woke up grabbing and firing it up for some early morning action. I’m now clogging up the DSL line getting some goodies to fiddle around with.

I’ll be checking my usage for the day. If I get more playing done than work, then I am god-forsakenly hooked. *Tan-dan-dan!*

For some reason, I don’t feel guilty spending at all for myself. It has me scared, actually. I better track my spending over the next couple of weeks. If I spend more than Php 2,000 (with the exception of utility bills payments and yes, that’s how miserly I am. I know some college kids who find that an allowance of Php 2,000 a week is not enough), I’m f*cked!

Twenty-four and still fiddling with toys fit for grade school kids. And giving one out for an anniversary gift for that matter.

Shout out to Elsie and Belle of Celtex Greenhills for being the best Greenhills stall attendants I’ve ever encountered.

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Save for a few weeks vacation when I was a kid, I lived in Quezon City all my life. All of my schools are located in Quezon City. My past two jobs were also based in QC. Unless I’d find some place more suitable for me to start a family, I’m staying put. There’s a lot to hate about the city but hey, it’s my hometown.

So what do I care about sex education in QC? Frankly, not much. But apparently, it’s such a big fuss. Especially since the Catholic Church.

Now what’s interesting is that I’m taking a graduate-level Anthropology class on Sex and Culture and we’ve just finished discussing sex and religion. And what makes our class more interesting is that we have a Roman Catholic priest as a classmate. Good thing he’s one of the more open-minded ones. Last meeting he discussed with us the church’s stand on sex. And boy, was it a very engaging one. At least we found out that Vatican II left out issues of sex and that all of the church’s stands with regard to the “nasty” is still based upon age-old doctrines. With that discussion, I believe that it reaffirmed my views that much of it is based on semantics which is the case with morality in general. With the proper words, what bad can be made good and vice versa.

So what’s wrong with teaching our kids about the birds and the bees, and more importantly, about reproductive health in general? I mean Quezon City is teeming with people. The largest city in the nation with more than 2 million people (90% of which are Catholic). And the largest baranggays are usually the repressed communities. Blame that to mucky urbanization but heck, in a city where prostitution is popular and where sex is one of the most favorite past times of repressed areas, sex education is a must.

I remember the time when one of our former househelps was impregnated by her taxi driver boyfriend. They had the money to pay for a motel room, but they scrimped out on the condom. The result? A kid in 9 months. And our househelp, when her period suddenly stopped, asked our mom whether a woman can get pregnant even if they only did it once. That time, ignorance wasn’t bliss. Reality stares us at the face that people aren’t well-educated enough when it comes to sex.

Now my question is how would QC handle sex education? Who will formulate the curriculum? Who will teach it? Will there be materials available? Incompetence in any of those areas might just mean disaster. With a growing teacher population who are basically unqualified to teach, why even institute areas that might lead to more misinformation?

All those while the church is yakking about the immorality. This is where religion becomes hegemonic as it imposes its own morality on state and legislation. State trumps priest but God trumps state. A conundrum?

Would I go on to say that whenever the church does that, they become unconstitutional on the basis of the separation of church and state? Maybe. Maybe not. Or then again maybe a resounding “Hell yeah!”

Thus, I go straight to hell.

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I used to be a fan of pro-wrestling. It’s like soap opera for men. Never mind the idea of two (or more) guys in trunks or tights grappling each other, trying to pin the other or make him submit. It’s the brainless and barbaric side to pro-wrestling that appeals to me. And yes, for hot-blooded men out there, there’s always the sexual appeal of the women and, as WWE color commentator Jerry Lawler exclaims, “The puppies, JR, look at those puppies.” Puppies referring not to canine young, but to big, and luscious mammaries.

Which leads me to wonder how could they move with those gigantic breasts? (Well, most of they would have probably had their breasts done like this New Jersey breast augmentation). I mean, it’s really amazing, especially when they begin to wrestle – doing all of those high flying. Do those racks make them aerodynamic or something? I wouldn’t know, ’cause I don’t have boobs.

I really wonder if seeing girls go competitive would even account for women empowerment. I mean the wrestling fan demographic is composed by hot-blooded beer-fueled males and a large part of women wrestling appeal would probably be the male fetish of seeing women “got at it.”

Retired female wrestler Trish Stratus claimed in an interview that she would never do Playboy which is stark contrast to the rest of the other WWE Divas (like Sable, Torrie Wilson, Ashley Massaro, Candice Michelle…). Trish claims “it’s not my style” and says that she wants to be remembered as a champion wrestler.

Oh well, whatever they say, it will always boil down to “The puppies, JR!”

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Anyway, with regard to that topic, we had a short discussion on the concept of courtly love (which was summarized in a treatise written by a guy named Andreas Capellanus). Courtly love was supposed to be the weltanschauung (a fancy German term for “world view”) of that period. With the belief that anyone who goes against it brought about the disorder that led to a culture’s downfall.

For those who are asking “Is chivalry dead?” then it’s probably a good idea for you to read up on Capellanus’ The Art of Courtly Love. Chivalry’s supposed to revolve around this concept. And for all you lovely ladies who have long sought for that knight in shining armor, here’s a bit of Capellanus. Make a check list if your guy believes in any of these. Guys, check this out too (and probably find out what an oafish brute you are, hehehe…).

This list comes from Book II, Chapter VIII: The Rules of Love

1. Marriage is no real excuse for not loving.
2. He who is not jealous cannot love.
3. No one can be bound by a double love.
4. It is well known that love is always increasing or decreasing.
5. That which a lover takes against his will of his beloved has no relish.
6. Boys do not love until they arrive at the age of maturity.
7. When one lover dies, a widowhood of two years is required of the survivor.
8. No one should be deprived of love without the very best of reasons.
9. No one can love unless he is impelled by the persuasion of love.
10. Love is always a stranger in the home of avarice.
11. It is not proper to love any woman whom one should be ashamed to seek to marry.
12. A true lover does not desire to embrace in love anyone except his beloved.
13. When made public love rarely endures.
14. The easy attainment of love makes it of little value; difficulty of attainment makes it prized.
15. Every lover regularly turns pale in the presence of his beloved.
16. When a lover suddenly catches sight of his beloved his heart palpitates.
17. A new love puts to flight an old one.
18. Good character alone makes any man worthy of love.
19. If love diminishes, it quickly fails and rarely revives.
20. A man in love is always apprehensive.
21. Real jealousy always increases the feeling of love.
22. Jealousy, and therefore love, are increased when one suspects his beloved.
23. He whom the thought of love vexes, eats and sleeps very little.
24. Every act of a lover ends with in the thought of his beloved.
25. A true lover considers nothing good except what he thinks will please his beloved.
26. Love can deny nothing to love.
27. A lover can never have enough of the solaces of his beloved.
28. A slight presumption causes a lover to suspect his beloved.
29. A man who is vexed by too much passion usually does not love.
30. A true lover is constantly and without intermission possessed by the thought of his beloved.
31. Nothing forbids one woman being loved by two men or one man by two women.

Source: Capellanus, Andreas. The Art of Courtly Love. Ed. F. W. Locke. USA: Fredrick Ungar Publishing Co., 1957.

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First it was Britney. Then Cameron. And then excrement comes in contact with the fan with Jessica Biel and Alyssa Milano. Give me the “who’s next!”

I used to diss boy bands. I never was a fan of pretty castrati boy bands (though amazingly I could sing along Backstreet Boys and NSync, oh God, I’m gay!). Just take a list of the pretty ladies those boy band boys have taken as trophies. The list goes on! Oh the humanity. I guess I just have to diss them all over again.

Anyway, I know my girlfriend will kill me for this post. Still, Justin Timberlake sucks.

Read some more here.

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Daniel Radcliffe naked with horses doesn’t sound too good. Drool, you crazy fan girls, drool!

For more pictures, visit: Best Week Ever

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A “faggot” (or “fagot”) is a word used for a variety of ways. A denotation could mean a type of fabric stitch. Another would be the action of bundling rods or sticks. At times, it can be used to denote the actual bundle itself. However, today, it has come a long way from these denotations with its more popular use as a derogatory term for homosexuals.

I have nothing against homosexuals and as for religion, I have long since accepted that you need not shit on anyone’s faith. I promote tolerance for both sexuality and faith.

This morning, I received an e-mail from Ken Ocampo condemning this guy(/gay?) for being a “faggot” and being an anti-Christ.

The email cites:

I am writing to you with hopes that you spread our outrage to as many people possible. We’re appalled that one of the country’s top bloggers is a gay and an antichrist. The “faggotry” message he is spreading to the youth is very disturbing. Hundreds of thousands of people around the world read his website. Many children and youth read his filth. What is even more disturbing is he make a joke out of Jesus by posting very disturbing photos of British people mocking Jesus our savior on his website. It’s an insult to what Filipinos stand for, including our religion, our values, our traditions, our beliefs and our faith.

http://www.bryanboy.com/bryanboy_le_superstar_fab/
2006/10/jesus_is_our_fu.html

Now, I know a few other bloggers have discussed and cited this on their blogs, I think that I’d try to give out my two cents worth since I did receive the e-mail. It is not easy as I do have varying opinions for both sides as I have tried to look into the case for further detail.

I do understand that the Roman Catholic Church has been a bit accepting towards the fact that research has shown that a minority of the world’s population of human beings have natural homosexual orientation. Still, it has quite a negative view towards homosexual acts since for the Catholic Church, sex’s primary purpose is for procreation. A lengthier discourse on the Catholic position is found here. So with this premise, there will be no Brokeback action for Catholic human beings with testicles and penises. Lest they risk the eternal fires of hell.

I was born and raised a Catholic. But for some very personal reasons I found myself jaded with organized religion that I have not practiced the Sacraments for quite sometime now. For now, I would say that I am still in the process of soul searching. I am not an atheist, that’s for sure. I consider myself an agnostic but I am still inclined to stick with Judeo-Christian morality.

I am heterosexual. I have been attracted to women all my life. I have a girlfriend whom I really love. And I do believe that I will be loving her for the rest of my life. I have never been in a homosexual relationship or considered being in one. Now, will I engage into a homosexual relationship? As I have said, I am straight. As long as one is not out to violate my anus, another person being gay is fine by me.

However, a lot of my friends are gays, lesbians and bisexuals. For the better part of my life, I have accepted the fact that some people are gay. And believe me, these gay friends of mine are very close friends who know more than just my name or what I have been doing routinely. One of the best professors I had in college was gay and I am not ashamed to say that I admire the person. Does their liking another human bearing the same gonads as theirs make them any less human? No.

You can freely substitute the words “Jew” and “Christian” with “homos” and “straights” in Shylock’s speech and it will still be pretty much be coherent. But we do acknowledge the fact that machismo, regionalism, and religious fanaticism still runs high in the Filipino society such as this case in point.

Well, my personal bottom line is that sexual or religious fanaticism should be misplaced in modern society. Tolerance is still the key to keep adversity in check amidst diversity. And there is a word for easily-led automatons who condemn a whole race, practically erasing them from a part of the world – they are called “Nazis.” And for that fanaticism, 60 million people died around the globe.

Think of all the chaos that religious fanaticism has caused – the Crusades, the Holocaust, and the anti-Muslim fervor created by 9/11 and the US retaliation.

Talk about Filipino pride and morality? I bet that Inq7.net has more viewers worldwide than bryanboy. And don’t you think that just the sheer ratio of bad news to good news is quite lopsided in favor of the former? Everyday, all the news about corruption and the breakdown of the Philippine social and moral fabric does send the image that we are a race to be damned to hell because 1) as a democracy, these thieves are our collective choice as leaders and 2) faith in general has not helped much in everyone loving his/her neighbor. Have you read that hunger is at an all time high? But the Catholic doctrine as guided by Jesus’ words has cited that we should feed the hungry. But why do we not see an online petition raging against people standing below five feet? Why have I not received an invite for a signature on an online petition for the Filipino Web community to share a piece of pan de sal for those families in need.

This issue is all about tolerance and balance. For Mr. Ocampo, I think that I somehow have helped you in publicizing your “outrage” against this homosexual but I do not intend to be part of your online petition. I hope that you will not damn me to hell for not being a “good Christian” as I also hope that you do not consider that Ghandi is roasting in hell for not being Catholic (not that I am anywhere near Ghandi’s good deeds). As for that bryanboy blogger person, I do believe in freedom of speech but I also believe in social responsibility. His/her site could sure use a PG-warning for the visuals, content, and language.

What I could suggest is for readers to be open-minded yet critical to what the Internet has to offer. We could all choose not to view bryanboy.com if we want to. We all know that the Web is a war zone of good and bad information. And for Filipino adults wary about children reading such material as what is found in bryanboy.com, download and use any one of these. This issue all boils down to one’s responsibility to oneself and to others.

It is quite ironic for me to start closing this thing by referring to Michael Jackson, well, mostly to the song Man in the Mirror anyway. “If you want to make a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change.”

As much as I do not want to act oh-so-righteous about this thing I am pretty much sure that a handful of you who are reading this will think otherwise. But come on, if there is not one thing in this whole piece strikes as generally acceptable or, in the least, logical, then I would rest my case on this matter and shut up.

Faggot. I’d rather have ourselves examine our world of how our society’s moral fiber is stitched (faggot-stitched) from all angles not just because one loves the same sex or believes that there is no Jesus.

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