The ConstructDiscourse, Society, Language, New Media, and I

In line with the interview meme going around, I asked Sexy Mom to interview me. She fielded me with five questions. I was hoping to answer them immediately but matters have taken precedence over this self-centered debauchery that is sharing more personal stuff about myself. And props to Sexy Mom for asking golden questions that I’m afraid to mangle with my pseudo-intellectual takes.

1. What gives you a real high?

   I would’ve said doobie brownies but I haven’t really gotten high from drugs and highs from those things aren’t real so I have to say overcoming the odds. I’ve always loved playing the underdog, face things head on and coming out on top. I’ve always been a competitive person even if it’s only myself that I have to compete with. It’s in pushing that extra mile and reaching the goal that gives me an all natural high.

2. Is that seeming seriousness you project the real you, or is it just a facade?

   I’m a serious person with a funny and moronic side. People have always remarked that I rarely express things the way people my age would. My adviser during my third year in high school has remarked that my outlook in life was too serious which ran in contrast with my pudgy, chubby, teddy bear like appearance. So I have no pretensions with my seriousness. I really am serious. Perhaps credit that to the tough times I went through as a kid.

   But I still know how to be fun at times. There’s no point living life by always having a dreary outlook.

3. Has teaching in UP been a part of your plans? your dreams? your ambitions? What next?

   My childhood dream was to become a lawyer. In hindsight, I still wonder if it’s really my dream or something that my dad (who dropped out of law to support his siblings) wanted. It’s the real reason why I took up English Studies in the first place. Language majors have high passing rates in law school admission exams. But certain events during my third year college prompted me to reconsider my plans.

   I became really jaded with our concept of law. I think the system is just too flawed to be worth dedicating the rest of my life to. Third year was also the time when I began taking up major subjects in my program and I fell in love with my discourse analysis class. I was also getting good grades and great feedback from my professors. That’s when I decided to pursue the field. And plans of staying in the academe materialized.

   I applied for a teaching spot when I was just about to graduate. I did fairly in the tough screening process but didn’t make the cut due to limited vacancies. But I was put in the list just in case more teachers were needed. I worked the corporate route and waited for the time to come. And now is the time.

   What next? Finish my MA and become a professor. Then perhaps a PhD. I’m still looking for a computational linguistics program. Sadly, it’s not available here in the Philippines so I have to look abroad for that one and I have to apply for a scholarship just in case. But experience has cautioned me time and again not to look too far ahead.

   But believe it or not, I want to run my own auto mechanics shop in the future.

4. Now that you have revisited your wish list and task list written a couple of months ago, how will a new one look like?

   Hmm… I haven’t really thought about more concrete plans as of now. I think there would be a lot of changes given the recent events. I still have a debt to sort out so no lavish expenditures on my part as of yet. As of now, I’d rather focus on getting my groove as an instructor in the University. And probably work on shedding the remaining 15 pounds of over weight.

   Oh yes, I plan on getting the laptop just before classes start so I can continue blogging while in UP. Angelo suggested that I do a Rom Feria and ask for a laptop fro UP. Sadly, I’m still a probie and things are different across departments and colleges. Our own department doesn’t even have enough PCs for faculty use.

   And I’ll be saving up for that 2nd/3rd-hand car but that will take a while. Still, there’s no better time to start than now.

5. If your life were a song, what will it be?

   Tough one. There had been so many events in my life that I probably need a full soundtrack with several songs to capture everything. My choice will shift depending on the day and mood. During my pre-20 years, I would have said Smashing Pumpkin’s 1979 which is basically a teen angst anthem. But as of the moment, it would probably be Dishwalla’s Until I Wake Up. While it has some shades of a sad love story, I take it as a tribute to sleep and dreams that’s essentially captured first verse and chorus.

   I rest my head
   Between the bed and sky
   Download my dread
   Disarm my mind
   Make it dry

   Nothing in motion, and I’m satisfied
   No disappointment, until I wake up
   Don’t want to wake up

   While I probably would forgo that last line of the chorus, it pretty much sums up of those brief moments where I can get some peace of mind. So far my life is much like that – a long story with choice moments of joy from which I would rather not leave.